Count Furcula – or – Happy Wishgiving

Image from Wikipedia

Furcula. That is the funny-sounding, official name of what we commonly refer to as a wishbone. It means “little fork” in Latin. Furcula.

During this season of giving thanks, it is traditional for two people to rend this little bone from the turkey carcass and, in a sometimes spirited contest of hand strength and cunning, snatch it apart. The person who winds up with the biggest half gets to make a wish…over part of a dead bird bone. Fun! Thank the Romans. They started it.

We spend a great deal of time every November waxing poetic over all the many things we are thankful for. I can’t help but think how unfair it is to only get one wish, and only then if you manage to wrestle half a bird bone from your dinner guest. That’s why this year, I’m making a list of my wishes now — furcula or no furcula.

  1. I wish for a winter with no snow even though I already have my boots, blanket, and emergency water in the trunk, just in case.
  2. I wish the Clinique lady would quit referring to my cute freckles as “sun damage.”
  3. I wish I could somehow, miraculously run a mile without falling over gasping for breath and nearly dead, even though I don’t really care enough to work up to it.
  4. I wish I did care enough.
  5. I wish that everyone currently living in these United States would remember that their ancestors, whether way back or up close, all came here from somewhere else, with the exception, naturally, of true Native Americans.
  6. I wish it was not frowned upon to have a martini (or two) at lunch, on a Thursday.
  7. I wish for the use of down-home, God-given, come-in-out-of-the-rain common sense by the general populace.
  8. I wish every child could write, paint, dance, sing, and dream with absolute freedom from judgment.
  9. I wish I could sleep with the closet door open.
  10. I wish I could rock a wild chapeau with feathers…and sequins…and velvet trim…and maybe a short veil.
  11. I wish I could remember more.
  12. I wish I could forget some.
  13. I wish I wasn’t afraid to make pie crust from scratch.
  14. I wish that the word “bossy” would be replaced with “goal-oriented” or “leader” or just plain “boss.”
  15. I wish I could carry a tune. My family wishes I didn’t like to sing so much.
  16. I wish beets didn’t taste like dirt because they are so dang good for you.
  17. I wish fried foods didn’t taste so good because they are so dang bad for you.
  18. I wish that people who call themselves Christians yet continue to perpetrate hate would remember the words to “Jesus Loves the Little Children” and think long and hard about what they really mean.
  19. I wish that I still had my Big Wheel and that I could ride it down the sidewalk in my neighborhood.

My final wish? Well, it’s for you.

  1. I wish all of you a safe, happy, healthy Thanksgiving and that all of your wishes come true.